Since becoming a father I have come to realize there are many things for which I owe my parents an apology. The list is far too extensive to mention all or even most of them. However, there is one "move" that I'm sure Jack didn't invent but has become extremely proficient at executing. I'm guessing I did a similar manuever to my parents and for that I would like to apologize to them.
So, Mom and Dad: I am sorry for thrashing around like a crazy person high on PCP as you tried to change my dookie-filled diaper. I'm sorry for causing the poo to spread all over my legs, feet and stomach despite you holding me upside down by my ankles like a refrigerated side of beef. And once you managed to clean me off enough to sit bare bottomed on my bed, I'm sorry for giggling at you as I peed all over myself and my clean bed sheet and then rolling around in it as you frustratedly threw your arms in the air because now you had to give me a second bath.
Sorry Mom and Dad. Thanks for not leaving me there to marinate in my own waste. I'm sure you considered it if only for a second.
Jack had his 15 month check-up today. Everything was great! Jack weighed in at 31 lbs 4 ounces and is 35 1/2 inches tall. The doctor told us that in medical terms Jack is officially "gi-normous". Shortly after leaving the doctor's office my cell phone rang. It was Lane Kiffin on the line hoping to get a verbal commitment from Jack to play defensive end for USC starting in 2026.
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